Robin Williams – a chance for us to learn

Robin Williams (1951 – 2014): in a discussion of this tragic topic (depression, suicide, silence about the reasons and methods) I replied to an article of the blogger Isadora: you = “raised by a mother who had severe depression and was plagued with paranoid schizophrenia” and me (my mother made suicide too, so I understood, that depression is a severe danger) – we know what we are talking about. “F” for FINAL DAY should be more often a topic of writing. Many years I put my focus on suicide, trying to understand the structure of the process – and searching for techniques to change a depressive state of mind. At first I read with interest American psychiatrists’ books with focus on behaviorism. Much more efficient was, what I read in my psychoanalytic library: from Freud via Adler to Karen Horney or Otto F. Kernberg. I wrote many essays about famous people who made suicide. Nevertheless the public is shocked, if it happens again. No restriction on this topic, not any kind of censorship: we only have the chance to learn, if we are free to talk and write about things inside a mind! In Germany the people learned a lot, when the widow of a famous soccer star (who made suicide) went to many TV-talk-shows to break the silence! P.S.: the stats of my more than 2,000 wordpress posts daily present as my most read article the one about “suicide by charcoal grill” – I hope, the users of my site intern search machine find people to talk with, before they act in panic…

please read the comments:

https://flickrcomments.wordpress.com/2014/08/12/robin-williams-a-chance-for-us-to-learn/#comments

About Didi van Frits

writer, photographer, guitarist, painter

28 responses to “Robin Williams – a chance for us to learn

  1. vastlycurious.com

    He seemed a good man with demons, just like all of us. The great fall harder.

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    • if he had not been as sensible as he was, he had not been that great actor. But who is sensible can be wounded easier. His daughter did not answer to his birthday greetings… [maybe his divorces are an origin for his daughter’s revenge acting?] P.S.: there are many US soldiers coming home from war with a big trauma. Health care begins to react. I believe that an actor – Robin played a role in a movie about the Warsaw Ghetto WWII – that an actor can get traumatized by certain film scripts too – he lives some months in this extreme state of mind!

      Liked by 4 people

      • Made me sad too when I heard on tv news… It is not easy to understand why… Should be a big pain under the image of him… But you said well, , who is sensible can be wounded easier… and what’s coming or touching and from where, we don’t know… he was great name with his great films, he will live forever. Thanks and Love, nia

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        • dear Nia, “who is sensible can be wounded easier… ” – I’ll never forget your sensible report of the wasps, dying in the ashes of your oven… – and I’m sure, if the little owl living in the chimney nearby would get some harm, you would be very sad too…

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  2. Lost a niece of 14 years old this year!…the heartache left for her parents, etc. is so overwhelming!…and they were addressing the issue with the means they knew…her video left us still wondering as to how she actually felt…with such a different look on the outside!

    Liked by 1 person

    • when I went to school, as a teenager, two boys of my class committed suicide; since then I have my focus on this topic…; one had a revolver, the other one used four techniques to make all clear: 1) opened his arms to bleed 2) put gasoline over his head to light the fire, 3) on his feet electricity 4) jumped from the table with a rope around his neck. It worked efficiently. Reason: he was the journalist of our school magazine, published by the scholars. But the director made hard censorship restrictions. I was the next boy to make the job vs. the director, an old German Nazi. Since them I’m fighting vs. censorship. And I will not commit suicide, whatever the restrictions are. Sometimes I changed the publishing platform. It is much better, since I write in English.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. It’s very sad. I agree, being more out in the open, reducing the stigma of mental illness, and talking more openly about suicide are all things we need to do. I too prefer Kernberg over the behaviorists. Yours is one of the brave voices that speaks up; thank you for that.

    Liked by 1 person

    • 10 years of childhood abuse made me need the support of psychologists. Usually the healthcare organizations pay for 4 months. In my case they payed 7 years: And it worked! Usually the support by hospitals are not long enough, not deep enough. Only the high society can pay a decade support by a good psychoanalyst. Woody Allan for sure. Sorry that Robin Williams didn’t find a perfect help. P.S.: my daughters had the nickname Robin Williams for me since they saw his movies introducing inspiring teachers…

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Thank you so much for this post. I have known many many people, too many, who have struggled with severe depression. My brother was a heavy drug user in his teens and tried to commit suicide on my graduation day. He struggles to this day with mental health issues. It is so incredibly sad yet hard for people to understand as it really hurts. Some, the lucky ones, get help and can live while others such as Robin Williams can no longer bare the pain. I just truly wish that someday our world deals better with mental illness. So many need help. Then there are those who kill others with guns like the innocent children at school shootings. Much needs to be done. thank you for this post.

    Liked by 1 person

    • you wrote: “Then there are those who kill others with guns like the innocent children at school shootings…” – Yes, it’s a message too, as it is a message to commit suicide. And saying it is an “inherited gen” (often heard this argument) is the trick to ignore that surrounding social networks are partially guilty. As for school massacres: not only PC-games training violence, but for sure much ore big failures in the organized mass-school system… [as analyzed in the German ERFURT school massacre]

      Liked by 1 person

  5. It’s so shocking when someone we see as happy and full of life takes that sudden step to end it at their own hands. Suicide is powerful subject that brings on all sorts of emotion from sadness, to rage, to guilt, to a profound sense of loss…. I just wish he had seen his way out of that dark tunnel; especially given that, with his comedic talents, he helped so many of us find our way. May he Rest In Peace.
    Elizabeth

    Liked by 1 person

  6. It is so good that you are encouraging everyone to speak out on this, Frizz. There is such stigma surrounding mental illness and depression. This helps nobody, and certainly makes things worse for the people who are suffering from these conditions. I have a friend who suffers bouts of mental illness. In between she functions very well. But she is so freaked out by the notion of mental illness and how people regard her, that she goes into denial when the signs of a recurring bout begin, and tries to cover them up. Which only makes things worse. Such a vicious circle. So very sad.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Laura Bloomsbury

    This famous man made waves throughout the social media of a topic that is shocking and avoided. Many of us have walked on the threshold – I just wish we could find another word for depression. It does not explain enough – (as a therapist I found there was more understanding of it in existential theory). Life can deal one burden too many sometimes

    Liked by 1 person

    • governments put so much money and interest on expensive equipment for their armed forces – but much less efforts are made for health care…; and as for the term “depression”: in Germany the insurance company will not pay for a flat-rate diagnosis like depression. They demand DSM IV etc. diagnosis, for example personality disorder etc. – even borderline or addicted to xyz would be too flat..

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      • Laura Bloomsbury

        the last thing we want is to be classified…seemingly driven to be ‘boxed and packaged’ by health care insurance but even with our national health service, the DSM dictates. By the time DSM VI comes, we’ll all be in it!

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        • I liked a combination of existence philosophy and psychoanalysis; on the other hand DSM III / IV / V etc. (read them all) were a good basis to build up a more detailed structure of empathy…

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  8. Your words express what many who try to understand feel but cannot communicate due to stigma or lack of knowledge. Research and reading everything that is out there to read or counseling or love from friends or family can’t change the desire to know …. why!!! It is a disease. Perhaps, with this tragedy more dialog to find answers will begin. Depression has been around for too long. Thank you, Frizz, for saying what I feel deeply about on this subject.
    Isadora

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    • thank you, Isadora, also for your other comment: “Without our Vulnerabilities, we couldn’t feel the opposite of it … LOVE. I’ve been blessed to have someone in my life who can understand my rejection as a child and tries to help heal it. Thank you for your support, Frizz, and for always leaving your very insightful comments…”

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  9. Reblogged this on Inside the Mind of Isadora and commented:
    Frizz has written a powerfully well-said post called
    Robin Williams – a chance for us to learn
    Rest in Peace

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  10. A wonderful post, Frizz. Your words are very wise. I’m sure that sharing your own experience must have helped many people, over the years.

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    • Three other considerations going through my head:
      1) The sadness of a role-playing clowns is usually underestimated.
      2) There is a clear psychiatric treatment error if only the addiction is treated, but not depression. The elimination of addiction is the removal of the protective wall against the depression.
      3) If there were an escalation of a battle between him and his daughter (her method: not to respond) – then his technique was typically absurd (suicide as a message, a last effort to be the winner of a match)

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  11. Depression and Suicide are not an easy thing to talk. And if only Robin Williams made this subject more easy to understand…. I know that too, not for myself but very close to me. What can we say about depression ? It’s very unknown by people, because always linked to sadness. And unknown to cure it efficiently, becaus there are so many ways, so many reasons….
    And sometimes it comes to suicide… I’m not sure that media are talking about suicide in a good way, especially when it is a suicide inside a company, as we knew in France in Orange and Renault, several years ago. How to speak about it and not to promote it inside the mind of depressive people ? I don’t know

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    • Didier: suicide inside a company, as we knew in France in Orange and Renault – we had this in OPEL – and the company always tries to say, they are not guilty at all. There’s a map of suicide density, Bulgaria, Romania etc. on the top I believe…

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      • And the company is often guilty of one part of the “process” that led to suicide…. Because the professional problems are not the only problems , sometimes, but not always and now the company must follow that.
        It’s strange that car manufacture are in the top of the statistics 😉

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